“ I love talking about ambition because I think our sector  has forced people to kind of hide or be ashamed of their ambition.But when we can own it and this mutual ambition, like my ambition uplifts your ambition, which uplifts my ambition, Then we're all  benefiting.” Cindy Wagman

Beyond Coffee Chats: Rethinking Consultant Networking

Are you tired of superficial networking that feels more like a chore than a game-changer? In this episode, Cindy and Jess challenge the traditional "coffee chat" approach to building professional relationships, revealing how to create connections that naturally lead to business growth. They dive deep into the often-overlooked distinction between how men and women approach networking, and why combining both strategies might be the secret sauce to your success. 

If you've ever wondered how some consultants seem to effortlessly build thriving networks that lead to tons of business while others struggle to get beyond small talk, this episode is your roadmap to transformation. 

From handwritten notes that leave lasting impressions to the art of being memorable when you're not in the room, Jess and Cindy share the strategies that have helped them build six-figure consulting businesses. They also reveal why chasing "big names" might be holding you back, and how to find your true business besties who will champion your success.

Highlights:

• Relationship First, Business Second The most profitable networking happens when you focus on building genuine relationships rather than immediate transactions.

• Be Memorable Between Meetings Success isn't about how many coffee chats you schedule—it's about being the person people think of when you're not in the room.

• Strategic Gratitude Matters Taking time to acknowledge and appreciate your connections during "lull seasons" can lead to unexpected opportunities when you least expect them.

• Community Drives Revenue Building Better Together shows how combining authentic community with strategic business mindset creates powerful financial results.

Timestamp summary: 

• [00:01:31] Happy New Year and a warm welcome to the conversation about fractional executives in nonprofits.

• [00:02:29] Cindy shares why the Fractional Shift Summit was created and the growing buzz around fractional leadership.

• [00:03:11] The importance of defining “fractional executive” for the nonprofit sector and building shared understanding.

• [00:03:54] Jess introduces her summit session on the intersection of networking and meaningful professional relationships.

• [00:05:00] How women can adopt intentional networking strategies typically used by men for career growth.

• [00:07:01] Cindy discusses mutual ambition and how community uplifts individual and collective success.

• [00:09:00] The critical role of being memorable in networking and how it leads to business opportunities.

• [00:09:53] Why consultants need “business besties” to support and advocate for one another.

• [00:11:00] Jess shares a real-life example of effective, authentic networking within Building Better Together.

• [00:13:00] How to focus networking efforts on gratitude and connection, rather than chasing big audiences.

• [00:14:00] The importance of surrounding yourself with uplifting and supportive peers for long-term success.

• [00:15:00] A preview of storytelling at the summit, showcasing real-world examples of successful networking.

• [00:16:00] Cindy highlights the collaborative opportunities available for fractionals in different specialties.

• [00:17:00] Details about the summit’s free registration and prizes, including a year in Jess’s Building Better Together.

• [00:17:45] Final call to action to join the Fractional Shift Summit and transform your nonprofit consulting business.

Find Us Online:  https://www.confessionswithjessandcindy.com/

Connect with Cindy:

Cindy Wagman Coaching https://cindywagman.com/

The Good Partnership https://www.thegoodpartnership.com/

Connect with Jess: 

Out In the Boons: https://www.outintheboons.me

Transcript:

[00:01:31] Hey, Jess. Hello. Good to see you. Yeah. Now when this airs, it's going to be early January. So happy new year to all of our listeners. 2025. Yeah. Good riddance to 2024. I think most people are saying.yeah, so I'm really excited for this conversation because we're talking about something that you're going to be presenting on or talking about, at my [00:02:00] upcoming summit called Fractual Shift.

[00:02:02] Yay, my first summit, which in whole is due to Jess telling me I need to do this so many times that I had to listen. I know. What was it that you finally said? Okay. I don't even know.I think actually one of the things I think is like fractional executives is picking up steam in our sector in a significant way.

[00:02:29] And you know me, I like to talk about ambition and I want to have a pretty significant stake in that ground. and so for me to be able to do this quickly, get it out into the world and take up space around it. Is probably the one big thing. And I have this launch for the fractional fundraiser Academy coming up, right?

[00:02:52] this was basically a launch event for that. so those things combined, and there's been [00:03:00] some people who've messaged me like, Oh, like I heard someone talk about fractional, but they're not really talking about it the same way you are and stuff like that. So I'm actually kicking off the S the summit with a kind of like.

[00:03:11] Let's get clear on what this is and what it's not. And so I think the sector needs a shared definition, that will benefit, like, I think everyone benefits from more people knowing and having a clear sense of what this is and what it's not. All those factors. I finally said yes. and so we're going all in.

[00:03:32] It is for all fractional executives. not just fundraisers, but it is specific to the non profit sector. and Jess, you are speaking and I'm so excited because I love, well, I love all the topics. I truly like handpicked all of the sessions. But yours is something that I'm very passionate about.

[00:03:54] So do you want to tell us a little bit about what you're going to be talking about? Yeah, I'll give credit where credit is due. [00:04:00] So I came across like some real, And I sent it to Cindy and I was like, this is what I mean when I'm talking about like community and networking and it was, a clip of Gwyneth Paltrow of Goop at one of her summits talking to this entrepreneur, CEO named, I wanna say her name is Emma.

[00:04:23] I'm not gonna remember her last name right now. She's, the CEO of a lot of the Kardashian brands. She's a mother of four. She's just like my new favorite entrepreneur, super badass. And she was just talking about, How men view networking as a means to an end. they are using it to get deals done, to get jobs.

[00:04:49] They're using it towards their advantage, and women tend to use networking as a way to, be in community, and share thoughts, and, opinions, and feelings, and she wasn't saying that [00:05:00] either are right or wrong, but what she was saying is that women could take A page from the men's book to use networking, as a way to bolster their careers and as a way to climb the ladder, so to speak, and not be apologetic about that.

[00:05:18] And I saw that and I was like this. This because when people ask me about building better together, which is the community of nonprofit consultants that I started a few years ago, that's what it is. Like it was really started as a place for folks to come together and ask their questions and talk real talk and share thoughts and ideas.

[00:05:38] But what's been born out of it are these really valuable relationships of money exchanging hands,Of speakers getting gigs, podcast invitations happening. Like it's like real resources. and so for me, it was like, it's so much more than like being in community and feeling seen [00:06:00] and heard it's like actual financial exchange.

[00:06:05] and how can we like. Light that on fire a little bit. Yeah, I love that because, and I think when you had that, I was like, oh, and I had just heard Amy Porterfield talk about this as well, where she's, where she talks about her masterminds and like how, intentional she seesa lot of masterminds that she's in with other men, and they're like super intentional about the business, and about Transparent, too.

[00:06:36] yes. And some of the masterminds where it's just women have been more like, Well, self care, let's do the nice things. Or they're into the personal, and Yeah, and so I was like, oh my god, Jess,you're on to this. And I think that,we talk, I love talking about ambition because I think our sector has forced people to hide or [00:07:00] be ashamed of their ambition.

[00:07:01] But when we can own it and this mutual ambition, like my ambition uplifts your ambition, which uplifts my ambition, Then we're all benefiting. Yeah. And so I just think that this topic is so powerful for us to be strategic and intentional about, it's not even just about who you're in relationship with in terms of other consultants and community, because Again, it's not, I actually, it's not either or.

[00:07:33] you can have a really strong, great benefit of just being in community with people, but that we layer on top of that idea of and, This, we're all running businesses, right? Well, I think the marriage of both the like feminine and the masculine, so to speak is what makes specifically like building better together, like so special.

[00:07:52] So for example, when you get to know someone. And this is like what part of what we'll be discussing [00:08:00] on a personal level and you trust someone, then you're actually able to quote unquote sell or present or recommend that person or their business to a potential buyer. Buyer way better than like just reading their LinkedIn profile And so it isn't I don't want people to get it wrong.

[00:08:23] Like I'm not advocating for like straight transactional I'm actually advocating for the marriage and if anything it's more take what you get in the community in the feminine and then add the masculine and the feminine the means to the end on top of it because there's room for both.

[00:08:40] Yeah, I actually use this as an example a lot when, because this comes up with clients a lot. Networking, I believe, is the fastest way to get business, like through your network, referrals, fastest way to find clients. But people are very uncomfortable with it because they See it as like [00:09:00] this one way, super transactional and it's, again, it's that marriage of the two.

[00:09:05] But what I say to people that I think is resonating these days, is that your out your strategic outreach to people in your network is only one step of the process. You need to be the person they remember when you're not in their inbox, when you're not on Zoom with them, when you're not in the room with them.

[00:09:25] A hundred percent. You need your business besties. Yeah, and like you need what we have with and everyone if you've been a listener of this podcast we have a pure mastermind with Brooke and Rach and Rhea and Tanya and like these are people that we're thinking about When we're not in the room together I think every Entrepreneur, every consultant needs that close community.

[00:09:53] And it doesn't have to be a group, but have enough people where someone's thinking about you when you're not [00:10:00] right in front of them. Having a strong network for business development is not about how many people you can email once every three months to be like, Hey, let's have a coffee. No, it's the people who you are memorable to.

[00:10:13] So, yeah, it's such a. Beautiful kind of overlap of that like you need the marriage of and so many people separate like I'm going to do it this way or I'm going to do it this way. And it's the combination that really makes it profitable and better. Yeah, and feel good. and so one of the things that like we're going to do at the summit is I think storytelling is the most powerful way to share information, and I know people just don't want to hear about me yak away.

[00:10:40] So, we're going to invite some people from BBT to share how this has worked in real life for them. And I also want to say, this takes time. And to Cindy's point about it's what you do in, The lull seasons is that really stands out because, I think probably Cindy, [00:11:00] I know what happens to me.

[00:11:00] I get asked a lot more, Hey, do you have time for a coffee chat? more than I'm asking people for a coffee chat. And when you're someone like me, who just really gets burned from doing a bunch of calls, it's not how I really want to spend time. Now it's a totally different experience. If we get to meet in person or whatever, But I'll just give an example of what to do in the lull seasons.

[00:11:23] So, there's a person in BBT. Her name is Casey. She's incredible. And she just reached out a couple weeks ago and was like, Hey, can I have your address? Sure. Why not? I just got the card delivered yesterday and it was just this handwritten note, like nothing fancy. But she was just reflecting on what the community means for her, what she notices in me and by golly, like the next time I hear of someone who needs Casey services, like she's going to be in my frontal lobe because she's doing the work when she doesn't need to do the work.

[00:11:57] Yeah. If that makes sense. Yeah. And that is [00:12:00] so important. And I just want to I've said this before in the podcast and I'll say it again, I am such a fan of people saying the nice things out loud. Such a fan of saying the things when you don't need to say them. When you have someone pop in your head when you're on your walk or you crash a podcast episode, you're like, you need to, I try and do that every single day, mostly cause I like to, but it's like that, those are the little things that actually are going to set you apart.

[00:12:26] Then hey, can we do a 15 minute coffee chat? Yeah. And honestly, so I, cause again, I see a lot of people's behind the scenes of their businesses. And I can't tell you, they think of networking and they think of, and I, this sounds conceited, but it's the thing. they have me on their list. They have you on their list.

[00:12:43] They have people who have big podcasts in their sector on their list. They think they need to get in front of people who have audiences. And that's not true. And those people have the least amount of time for a coffee and they probably get a [00:13:00] million asks. So again, you want to be the part, the like business bestie.

[00:13:05] It's not about who has the biggest audience. It's about who can you build a meaningful relationship with that they are thinking about you when you're not in the room. And that's, your community. Not everyone in that community should be expecting referrals all the time. or, you know, what have you from you, but they can absolutely build it from other people in that community.

[00:13:30] I mean, my community does the same thing, right? They refer to each other. but it's really not about getting in front of who has the biggest audience or who's influential or anything like that, those people are not going to remember you. I can't It's who do you actually like? Yeah, and I, to, one of the first things any of my fractional fundraisers do, and anyone else I teach, I just had this conversation with one of my clients today, about networking.

[00:13:57] I said, I want you to create a [00:14:00] list, but I don't want you to think of, whose audience you want to get in front of. I want you to think of who you're grateful for, who, whether it's last week or 10 years ago, has made a positive impact. In your career in the sector that you can just say thank you to like that those are the people Who you think of even if you're not face to face and they're more likely to think of you so I think we like the intentionality is misplaced in terms of what criteria we think of, who should I reach out to?

[00:14:35] And honestly, the other big thing I work with a lot of people who are burned out in our sector and who have had terrible bosses, I'm like, surround yourself with the people you like, it does not matter if you think that they can refer a sale to you or not right now, you have, In the same way, like with fundraising, like you've no idea of people's capacity.

[00:14:54] everyone in our sector knows people who know people. it's not, it's [00:15:00] really about surrounding yourself with the people who you feel uplifted by and you can uplift and, and then layering on that, More business mindedness. So for sure. So yeah, so we're going to talk about it and we're going to teach you and give you some examples of how people are actually doing it so that you know by the end of the conversation if you take anything away from the summit you can go and make a meaningful connection or two in a way that feels good and is actually the right fit and will lead to a means to an end which is hopefully like some business Yeah, and the beauty, especially of this conversation in this summit, is that, I think this was clear from the beginning, but it's a summit for non profit fractionals.

[00:15:45] which means that if I'm working with an organization, chances are they're much more comfortable with the idea of fractional executives. And so it's a great opportunity for, Other [00:16:00] fractional, I think there's such an opportunity to uplift each other and, you know, organizations that are willing to work with a fractional executive in one capacity, I have a much higher likelihood of wanting to work with them in another capacity.

[00:16:12] So I think that, there's so much great opportunity for collaboration. HR and marketing and fundraising and operations. And, some interim CEO type positions as well. So yeah, there, it's a great community. I'm so excited. So if you, my gosh, yeah. If you can't find your business bestie, they're like, where can you find them?

[00:16:36] And one of our prizes for the, for participation, we're, At the time of recording, we're figuring out exactly what participation the prizes will be for, but you will have the opportunity to win a year's worth of membership in Jess's Community Building Better Together. Which on the internet is such a special.

[00:16:57] I love, love, love that community. [00:17:00] so join us if you go to nonprofit fractionals. com, you can register for free. there isn't all access it's January 14th and 15th. So it's soon go do that now. if you're a fractional or if you're just thinking you might want to add fractional services to your consulting business, there's so much opportunity there.

[00:17:19] So. go check that out. Can't wait to see you, and we'll see you in the next podcast.